Ways to Support Someone You Love to Quit Smoking
At the 2022 Grammy Awards, singer/songwriter Bruno Mars lit a cigarette on stage while accepting his award.
I knew Bruno smoked. His social media accounts include posts about him switching to electronic cigarettes to quit to honor a promise he made to his mom. Clearly, he has not been successful in quitting. But lighting a cigarette inside a building, especially one filled with singers who probably want to protect their lungs as much as possible, is just plain inconsiderate.
Understanding tobacco addiction
For a few years, I worked with the American Lung Association’s Freedom From Smoking (FFS) program as a facilitator and trainer. I facilitated FFS sessions for people who wanted to quit smoking and trained others on how to facilitate the program as well.1
During these few years, I learned a lot about tobacco addiction, the shame that often goes along with that addiction, and how hard it is to quit. Tobacco is as addictive as heroin and cocaine and may even be more addictive. According to the CDC, the average person who smokes will try to quit many times before they are successful.2
Being a tobacco cessation counselor was interesting and rewarding. I had a newfound empathy for people who smoked and their difficulty in quitting. I think we all need to understand that smoking is an addiction and not a character flaw.
This or That
Do you have a friend or family member who smokes?
Smoking and asthma
Secondhand smoke will always trigger my asthma symptoms. Tobacco smoke has landed me in the emergency room more than once. Thirdhand smoke, the residual smoke that sticks to walls and furniture, is also known to be an asthma trigger.3
Tobacco smoke is an irritant that can hurt healthy lungs, too. No one should be forced to breathe in anyone else’s smoke.
How can you support someone who wants to quit smoking?
If someone you love (or maybe you) smokes and is interested in quitting, here are some possible ways to support them and improve their chances of quitting successfully.
Help them create a plan to quit
Just like with any other big life change, you need a plan to be successful. Discuss how they would like to go about stopping. Set a quit date. Encourage them to talk with their doctor about medications that may help and any concerns about side effects.
It’s important that they are honest with their doctor about how much they are currently smoking so they can get the right amount of medication. Help research which cessation program or tools may work best, such as online, in-person, an app, or a combination of all 3.
Define the “why”
Everyone must have a reason (or reasons) to quit. Write down all the reasons they want to quit on small pieces of paper – like “I want to breathe easier,” “I want to live longer for my kids,” or “I want to improve my asthma.” Put them in a jar. Whenever they want to give up or give in to a craving, they can pull out a piece of paper and remind themselves why this is so important.
Be part of a support system
While quitting, some people may not be able to hang out with friends who smoke. This can be challenging, so a support system is needed. Be available to talk on the phone or text whenever someone needs help getting past a craving. Online support communities may be helpful as well.
Help them manage recovery symptoms
Nicotine withdrawal can be difficult for many people who are trying to quit. Most will experience some symptoms, but these symptoms are a sign of the body recovering from its addiction. Help your loved ones embrace and get through these symptoms, knowing that each day they don’t smoke they are getting healthier.
The best thing you can do to support someone during their quit journey is to just be there. Listen and acknowledge how difficult quitting is. You can learn more about helping someone quit from the American Lung Association.
Have you quit smoking or helped anyone else quit?
Join the conversation